Na escuridão de uma noite qualquer, senti minha pele gelada e pálida. Grande coisa, sempre foi desse jeito.
Parei e pensei de que tudo o que eu dizia no início estava certo: não iria durar. Um sorriso bobo surgiu em meu rosto, me mostrando que eu realmente estava certa. Aquilo não iria durar, não iria funcionar. Eu sorri de novo. Dessa vez, um sorriso maior, parecia ser mais verdadeiro que o outro.
Não que eu não goste dele, mas certas coisas não são suficientes para aplacar a dor de um coração. Foram tantas as lindas palavras que ele me disse, mas no fundo, ou melhor, eu por inteira sabia que não ia dar. Outro sorriso veio em disparada.
Eu estava feliz, afinal, não simplesmente por estar certa, mas por saber de que aquilo iria acabar. Não sentiria mais culpa e o vazio por ele não estar aqui, comigo. Eu poderia abrir minhas asas de novo e voar. Sempre pude. Mas dessa vez, o arrependimento não voaria ao meu lado; não me alcançaria.
Cruzei os braços, ainda sorrindo feito uma completa idiota, encostei as costas na cadeira e fiquei observando a tela do computador, que estava ligando. Nem mesmo a demora daquela lata velha tirou minha idiotice. Quando me deparei com o desktop, sorri com o plano de fundo colorido que ali havia. Alguns cliques e me surgiu outro sorriso.
Lá estava ele. O outro ele. Não necessariamente "outro", mas tudo bem. Era alguém que, de fato, estava aqui. Precisei por meus óculos para ver se realmente era ele, afinal, com aquela foto minúscula e minha miopía.. Nada iria bem.
"Sim"
Aceitei seu pedido no Orkut. É, ainda uso essas coisas...
Deparei-me com um recado. Sorri; de novo. Encarei meu livro sobre Hitler e toda sua conquista, com um olhar matador. Eu ri.
Afinal eu estava bem. Apesar de tudo, e de todos. Não fora um bom tempo, devo lhe dizer, mas eu estava sorrindo.
Com uma boa música de Frank Sinatra, voltei ao silêncio da minha bela e boa noite.

tchu tchu ru tchu ru

nobody knows how i hate when somebody do something by nothing.. it freaks me out, but, fuck yea, i don't need this.
well, as it is morning, there's going to be nothing to do neither say
i might do a new post later, if something cool happens, or if i find something cool navegatin' in the internet! hoho

my flu still here.. eh, and.. well, no so bad as before, anyways.

going goin' g2g

cya ♥

post number 30 haha

and time it's going to fly in your eyes. all my dreams will come true, the real ones

ladies 'n gentlemen.. it's with love that i can say to you that i have french stuff now!
woot, amazing!
haha
my doctor just came from Europe, and i asked her for a few things, like those handouts. it was by a sweetner called Pure Test, by Pure via. actually, there is sample of the sweetner! i need say that i understood good part of stuff written in french..

Toute révolution commence par une idée simple
Pure Via vous invite à faire le Pure Test
Faiter l'expérience et testez Pure Via vous serez surpris!
Vous aussi vous succomberez à son bon goût sucré et sa texture si proche de celle du sucre
Nouveau Pure Via, naturellement sucrée, zéro calorie
www.purevia.fr


Also, there is a little thing that u cut off and it says

0,50€ de réducion immédiate à valoir sur l'achat d'une boîte 40 sticks Pure Via ou 'une boîte 80 g Pure Via. Offre valable jusqu'au 31/12/2010 limitée à la France métropolitaine. Sur présentation de ce bon à la caisse du magasin. Un seul coupon par produit acheté. L'utilisation de ce coupon pour tout autre achat ou la présentation d'une photocopie donneront lieu à des poursuites.

and this totally called my attention: Une plante millénaire originaire du Brésil et du Paraguay

haha, we are in french sweetners!
it has a tea smelling, really good. well, it says Une recette exclusive avec des arômes naturels, it explains a lot. my doctor told me that they were giving it in the streets, so she got one, as i asked for. what else.. ooh, entries for Louvre and Eiffel Tower. used, of course
for Louvre (I'LL GO THERE SOMEDAY! JUST BECAUSE OF TRAOD) is 9,50€ and for Eiffel is 13,10€. also, a ticket, Paris to Luxembourg. this thing coasts 53€!!! well, one of the fastest trains ever.. it worths haha
she'll get me a keychain. haha, lovely
i'll spend my work vacation there someday, i'll make my money worth going to Europe!
no more news

well, a gang came to lunch here
was Me, Milena, Augusta, Letícia, Cecília, Thaísa and Mariana
bunch of crazy girls haha

i'm happy with my gifts, i asked her for a handout, but i got a handout with a sample! hoho and used entries, pretty cool. now i know how stuff works there. all french stuff, btw.
also, there is your name in the right bottom of the train's ticket. in case, Fernanda, her daughter. she lives there, so she, her son and another daughter went there to visit :D

bad thing about tibia: wherever you go in that place, you'll get any messages. FUCK!


cya ♥

stop calling, stop calling

i dont wanna think anymore.. stop tellephoning me eh eh eh
i'm busy!

its so fucking cold here, and i've been so fucking tired
idk what to do, and neither what to say
all is boring. no classes saturday! HAIL! i need some sleeping, my head will explode
i finished reading Rising Sun, by Michael Critchton. it's really really good, it makes u think a lot. i dont like politics, but anyways. has action and drama, misterious and all stuff.

"There was a few things that I was regreting. First of all, I wish I could be without a certain type of love inside my fucking heart. Second of all, I wish that love wouldn't hurt so badly, so I could take a chance. Third of all, I loved wrong people before, believed 'em and got screwed. Now I'm lost, and won't change anything if you tell me that I'm wrong or crazy. I know, I'm insane. I wish it could be in another way, and it will be. I swear for myself, this shit will have a fucking change"

reasons for loving.. 日本 Japan ♥

Shibuya, Fuji Mountain, cosplays, the GazettE, aline nine., food, temples, Saitama Super Arena and Yokohama Super Arena, Miku & Bou & Teruki in Tekesuta Kousen cosplay, anime cosplay, sunsets, SuG~heavy + positive + rock, Versailles ~Philharmonic Quintet~ (R.I.P. Jasmine You, we miss you forever), pure love for MotherMonster, Danger*Gang... and much much more!

it's time to tell my story
of a girl i used to know
always cried into her pillow
under pin-ups in the wall
she didn't make a Italia conte
didn't get a TV show
then a nice man once've helped her
with a new portfolio

ow ow.. boring days, and why i have to do all wrong? i mean.. with you, i don't know what's right or what's wrong.

boring.

boring.

his body shape is like a pikachu!

i'll have most part of my life here? haha and nobody reads it, i guess.. nono, milena does. HI!
i was thinking about.. well, i dont know. but my humor isnt good.
like, kinda sad-ish feeling. no, neither sad, just empty. like i was before. but anyways
i need finish the geography work. this flu is killing me and making me feel so fuckin' tired, though.
it's pretty cold here, i'm freezing lol

i don't have anything to say! ><

cya ♥

when anonimous talk to u in twitter..

TO RIMD PAKAS MANO IARIRAIRAIARIARIRAIRIRA DORGIS


and lily allen was talking about water!

countless pain.

worries

i'm worried about my test. i need get better in my grades, so i'm almost eating my fingers to know. it's already night, and they said that the anwsers was going to be in intranet in the night!

and, was pretty fast to download Decomposition Beauty. i already had this DVD about.. 3 times in my laptop, but as it is a laptop, i had to delete it. and i found the download links again. but okie
nothing else i can say lol



cya ♥

the GazettE Tour 2006 - 2007: Decomposition Beauty Final - Meaningless Art That People Showed At Yokohama Arena

I totally forgot about how people get crazy with GazettE's shows.. I know now with my Decomposition Beauty again ♥

Listening to: Hyena (live) - the GazettE

new time to think, this time, about the world

"The first picture that took my attention was one with a sailor couple. As you already know, photography can have many reasons and thousands of meanings. In this one, seems to be a happy couple, maybe just chilling around or going to a trip, have honeymoon. Although, the guy can be leaving: long distance relationship or going to a war. Pictures can hide feelings, real meanings. The second was a after-war picture, with a mountain of corposes in the right. It shows how things works in our world today. There's no way of solving without wars: they need to kill innocent people, and sometimes, still can't get what they want. And shows that our civilization isn't that civil neither right, fair. Third one was the photo of a prision, with some men in their knees with polices around like they were being punished. Well, if you want make criminals to be good guys, you just can't act like 'em because this is what they do with victims: threaten 'em, punish, abuse and, most part of time, kill.
There is a lot of pictures where you can see how men decay by length of the years, though. In my opinion, as a normal citizen, is that world could be much better if the power men knew how to use, correctly, their moldy brains."

believe or not, i wrote this thing for my English homework.. God gave us capacity of thinking, or else, you're an animal. who stands in the power must know how to think, and think write. but moral changes in each person. someone can think that getting drunk is amazing, and someone else can think that those people must die. although, i'm talking about a world-wide hope: peace. as i'm brazilian, i'm not attacked directly with those wars, fights, disagrees.. but somehow, it changes my life. things get more expensive, people stop working because they can't pay their rents with the shit they recieve.. all turns around money, about having more. it can be good and fair for the men, not for all of us. people die, and they are my brothers, by God's words. there is no reason anymore. you do because YOU WANT, not because YOU NEED. you need a new brain, sir. yours is breaking and killing people everytime and everywhere. new brains, my dears. brand new brains.

now leaving policts and our chaotic world behind, what about tiramisu?
i'm not sure if it is italian forreal, or japanese. but seems to be so yummy!
i watched one video about how to do, goes chocolate, creams.. all things i love ♥
there is a few things that i want to recover in my laptop. it is pretty old things, but i was reading some tutorials about how have all this, or most part of it back. its things about beggining of last year, and a little before.
also i just have today and tomorrow to study. wednesday is my freaking test!!!!
i'll try to study math, the old subjects, geography, BIOLOGY and CHEMESTRY!! that woman seems to be kinda crazy. there is a lot of things that i dont understand when she says, especially in her tests. everything seems to be in GREEK for me! it's suicide if you dont study for this. and i've been pretty good in chemestry with my old teacher in my old school. he used to explain like every single detail, just like we were children, dumby ones, so we could understand everything perfectly. also, he was fucking funny, even with idiot jokes. but some makes u laught as hell, because its TOO idiot!!!
i have his MSN, i could ask him for something someday lol
now he is in another city, since i know. forreal, i miss him to teach me and say "OMFG WTF HAPPENED TO UR HAIR?!?!?" and then hug me lol
once, i've cut my hair by myself and it was really short. he got shocked, did a stupid joke then hugged me, and said that he was kidding. i hope so, i'm good at writing "good" things in tests and TABLES.

okok gotta see japanese hair videos (IM ADDICTED!!!) and study. and eat something

cya ♥

there's nothing else i can say, eh eh

bleached some roots of my hair today. idk why lol
maybe im inspired by japanese beauty saloons videos.. they are sososos cute ♥
i'll reborn as japanese someday! hehe


ooh im loving my hair lol
never bleach urself, in home, alone. i was lucky!
i'll post photos later.



mmm, nothing else to say

cya ♥

its time to think

i've just came from school. as the lunch is not ready yet, i'll post something
the most importart test is coming, and i know that i need all attention in this whole UNIVERSE. sometimes, i get a huge I in some question, just because of attention. like, i forget reading something, didnt notice a little thing.. it always happens, always!
each test i have, there is at least one wrong question, just because of those little little fucking little things
i got two coffees this morning, one in home, with lots of sugar (i was late, so my mom did it) and another in school's bar, without any little pinch of sugar. 100% coffee!
im awake til now, and this is good, because i want to do some homework this afternoon, as i wont have anything to do lol
my knee hurts, but because my inflamation. antibiotics seems to doesnt work for me, it hurts with and without em, so i've give up of taking meds.
the window of my room is full of concrete. those guys in the building beside us doesnt know how to take care. i hopefully think that they'll clean. or else, i'll sue em! we bought this apartament new, as the first owners, with clean windows. and i always had it really clean! if needs, i'll curse em too, so they learn that they can be careful.
now out of windows subject lol..
i need clips. tiny tiny tiny ones. they are good if u need to mark something in ur book, like "i need study 34 and 35 pages"
i forget these things easily, as long as i can see something there, showing that it is something important in those pages, i'll see it and read it. or do it, if there is some activity.
i've found three super tiny goldy clips. im using em in my math book: in the page i need to do my homework and in one page in almost end of the book, so i can check the awnsers later.
i am crazy for my lunch!! i mean, i didnt eat anything, just drunk coffee, anything else! ooh, nooooo, mariana gave me a little choco cookie.
we didnt finish watching Troy to history. this thing is too long!


maybe i'll write something later, idk.
notice that i've changed the tittle. not bouncy anymore xD
i was bored of it!!! always boooreeed!!


cya ♥

bouncy #9

im bored. and starting my new life routine. all organized, all in day. also lose some weight. hihi
i've asked to my teacher today about some exercises that i can do in home. first, to lose the belly!
forreal, i just dont know what to talk about!
i'm with a stupid headache and feeling really cold. i'll take my vits later. anyways



cya ♥

bouncy pic #5

i. was. there. GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ♥


Listening to: Bad Romance, Dance In The Dark, Fever, Alejandro and Happy I Could Die - all by MOTHERMONSTER Lady GaGa ♥

bouncy #8

SUPER MARIO IS LOVE ♥
ok, today i've lunched in the mall, with Milena, Letícia, Cecília, Emanuelle and Victoria. Was super funny ♥
especially me having laughting attacks.. but not about poops this time lol
then, we went to the games thing lmao we've danced, runned and i've tried to get a lil duck for me in those bears machines.. i've failed!! but okie. then, the girls was going watch Alice in the Wonderland (again) and mi came to my house. we've played all kinda marios u can imagine! ok, just super mario world and super mario bros. 2 ♥
i love to choose the princess! she kinda flies when u jump with her. OHH also we've played TOP GEAR, i didnt know, but it is mi's favorite game for nintendo 62 either!! i remembered about renting TOP GEAR 3000 in a "game store" near my old house. in asps because.. it was kinda of lan house just with playstations, and had movies [VHS ones (pretty old!)] and, of course, tapes for nintendo!!
i had a neighboor addicted to nintendo too. we've changed a game one, i just dont remember which one. now i feel regret of trading the game (mine as The Lion King) and for giving back my nintendo to my counsin..
now this thing is lost somewhere!! well, its hard to find a 62, especially now with WII..
then, when mi left here, i went sleep! i was so tired, just dont know from what. i was with headache before (hungry hihi) and.. idk. maybe the coffee i drunk this morning is making effect just NOW
anyways.. we are learning new stuff in math. geeez, i need get better!
FORGOOOT TO SAY! i saw my english teacher with her kids in the mall, and the boy was like "stop hugging me, Ana" or something like this. they are a little couple: girl and boy!!
if i'd have kids in a distant future.. i'd like to have a couple. so, in the same way i could play video games with my son, i'd make my little girl a little princess :D
some people freak out with me, i mean, i understand a lot about computers, used to understand LOTS about cars and stuff, i lolololoveveve video gamesd.. but, in other side, im a make up holic! and clothing, trends, fashion.. im simply weird.
in the same way, i like japanese rock and stuff. but i also lololoveveve Lady GaGa!
i must have something wrong lol
sometimes, i do cuttie faces while walking in the street, and nobody thinks that im listening to a freaky heavy rocky music. idk!!! im all wrong xDD

and i had a weeeird dream.. im trying to forget it, it wont come true anyways lol

tomorrow i have math, portuguese, chemestry, biology AND EXERCISES!!!!!! NOMNOMNOMNOM!
i've forgot about it.. shit!
well, at least i'll lose what i got this week lol
i did a bet, about 2 days ago, with a friend. he is all healthy and stuff, and he said that if i get fatter, he'll make me walk, run, jump and lose weight. being mad, i did the bet! will try to lose about 8kg (i really want to lose it, or 10kg. i wont get JUST healthy, also i'll be the way IIIII WAANT TO! lol) until.. july! month of my b-day, YAY 15 ♥
and idk idk idk lol idk how i'll do it, BUT I'LL TRY!!!!!! already did it once, but lost 6kg and i got all this shit back!! ALL
im crazy today!!?!?!? perhaps was my air keyboard..
while mi was playing TOP GEAR, i was doing a air keyboard. as the game has just three or five musics, and all are with those keyboards effects, i was "playing" and "dancing". the dudes of the building beside us was like "FTW!?!?!?!"
happyness in sad moments. already noticed it.








GRRRRRROOARRRRRRRRRR
i need shower. AND DO MY HOMEWORK TODAY! GRR
and remember about taking my vits tomorrow!
cya lovelies ♥

Sunrise - Brandon Heath

You wanna sound off but you can't find the words to
Nothin' makes sense in the way that it used to
Can't find the plus in the positive thinking
The well's run dry and you're not done drinking

Clouds start comin' and the sky will fall
Clock stares back from the bedroom wall
Now you're breathin' just to make it through the night

All you need is a sunrise
Just a moment of dawn
If you're lost in the twilight
Close your eyes and move on
When you're tired in the waiting
Even though it's gonna take you
A little more time
Just a little more time the sun's gonna find you

Holding your days like a stack of paper
Then you're chasing the wind as the pages scatter
You can save a few but you can't get 'em all back
So get out fast with your heart in tact

Find yourself on the very edge
Lying awake in an empty bed
Now you're breathin' just to make it thru the night


3rd post today, the last! but i need this lyrics somewhere

bouncy pic #4

wtf i was listening in 2000~2002!? well, now i know the Gazette. this pic is fucking old, but has Kai as drums, not Yume ♥
PS: yea, all men. such men.. geeeeeeeez!

bouncy #7

my fingers, forreal, are purple. it is freaking cold! but as i said once, love this weather.
i dont have too much to say, not in mood. idk what is happening, it is constant. VAACAATIONS OF THIS LIFE PLZ.

now i can play mario! amazing emulator for nintendo 62. my idol
i have homework to do, games to play and maybe tears to cry.

cya ♥


Listening to: Sunrise - Brandon Heath

bouncy pic #3

pretty much, this is it ♥

bouncy #6

i got the pictures from mariana's 15th party. oooh was great! i'll post some later.
my day was boring. not that boring, because i got B in geography and i was paying attention in portuguese lol
im not the best student ever, neither the worst. i used to be better, but since 5th grade.. well, things can decay, just like me in school. but ok, im sure i'll get better.
but anyways, im not sure about how im feeling. everything seems to be.. so.. i just dont know lol
i used to ignore some facts, like, unloved love (for me, is when u like someone who doesnt likes u in the same way, or in ANY way). and this shit is just killing me! it bothers me in a way, its so stupid! i, forreal, dont know anything to do. "i really need someone"
and im too young. see, our world is LOST! im 14, and i already need somebody by my side? well, my past was full of discovers about my origins (ok, it sounded just like a.. action movie, but it is real life), so it has consequences. young and numb. i should say dumb, but im not that idiot about people. i mean, my friends when they have problems, they come to talk to me xD its good, it seems that i know stuff, even if was just 14 years of smiles, tears, and stuff! idk what is going to happen next, but im waiting for a good thing.
ok, no more about this lol

i want go to "life is a loop". i need some dancing xD my cousin is like a official seller of tickets, bcs she is a dj. so i might talk to her.. today. mariana wants to come too! haha
its going to be pretty cool. i like parties, but im not invited for 'em lol
and my mom doesnt likes clubs and stuff, she is afraid of me doing something.. wrong..
"mommy, dont worry, i know how to take care of myself ♥♥"

spaaarrkliiiiinggg ♥

ok, cya ♥

bouncy #5

woot this blog is guetting older each second! this is pretty good.
idk what to say, because today was really boring and i've spent all my afternoon sleeping, there was nothing to do. so i sleep lol
im helping a friend, his girlfriend broke up with him with no reasons, such a idiot. she should be with him, as im without anyone, she dumps him!!!! lol
crises of a girl in love. im always in love, this is not normal!
but okie.
already told ya about my O in english right? oh, im amazed til now, pretty funny.
i want to watch POWER RANGERS~♥ i used to watch it, my whole childhood. even dragon ball z, hamtaro, sakura card captors, INUYAAASHAAAA ♥
and lots and lots of animes and random cartoons.

ok, im bored and need a good dinner, or else i'll pass out. ok, i wont pass out lol
but imma HUNGRYYYYYYYYYY GROAR

love. sucks.


cya ♥

bouncy #4

im kinda bored. nothing good at all to do. that's what happens when you sleep almost the whole afternoon. then you cant sleep in the night.
today we saw a good part of Troy, for history. that movie is kinda.. blerg. already saw it lots of times, even if i dont remember anything about it. it isnt worth for me, not right now, so i forget. but was kinda good, no history class today and neither next week: we'll finish the movie. everything has a bad side, though. we are going to make a text about the relation of some scenes of the movie with the history, and bla bla bla. old greece.
im also bored of spanish. idk why, but i cant take those freaky words anymore. yes, im brazilian and stuff.. but spanish is different! is kinda faster, and.. blerg, i dont like.
mariana got O in english too lol but anyways.. it is kinda hard to listen and decode what britanics are saying. so i was a lil afraid, because i dont understand that well when there's british accent. but i just love em, and speak like em sometimes lol
its pretty funny.
now my little baby is trying to eat my toes!! the funny thing.. is that really hurts! she is playing, im sure of it, but as she's a dog (duuuh), no sense of pain..
there is a way of stop listening baby, by justin bieber? i dont like justin, people already know it, but lately i've been interested about him, about his songs.. bleeerg. just like with Diva GaGa.
when she released just dance, i was like "come on! she is going to be the new trend.."
now i just love her, and could give her my monster heart. yea, i know, crazy, but simply love. i think she is a real person, not just a freak artist. her past isnt the best neither the worst, but she is forreal. it is her way, idk.. i love her ♥ xD

okie, enough for today. there's nothing else i can say, nothing else happened lol
i mean, nothing funny. or lovely. oh, damn, i forgot.. LOVE SUCKS.

cya ♥

bouncy #3

this layout sucks, i know it, but im not in mood of doing a new one. actually, im in mood, but im not inspired and i need somethings to edit HTML. so, a good template wont be avaliable for a while lol
lately i've been weird, since.. monday. im not sure why, but something is bothering me, inside of my heart, and i know that i dont care about it, but bothers and hurts. i hope that i can find something to fix it, but while this doesnt happens, i'll still be here.

- Sometimes, I can't hear your voice. Trying to trigger me?
- Maybe...
- Can I ask you something?
- Sure.
- What you said me that day... Was a invitation for dancing?
- Maybe...
"Maybe" used to be his anwser for everything.
- Ok, yes. Do... You want to dance?
- Well... Maybe.


cya ♥

bouncy pic #2

Listening to: In The Middle of Chaos - the GazettE

makes sense huh? lol

bouncy #2

My day was completely boring, as usual. We had Biology lab, working with yogurts isn't that cool. But anyways, was really cold! Last night I was wondering for glooves bcz my hands were freezing. Now they are kinda purple, because still cold. I love this weather, though. Without raining of course. I guess that I need some shopping, get cutie clothes and go to different stores, I'm sick of all the same.
And now I can play The Sims 3 freely! No more random crashes ♥
This is so lovely, I can build my styling houses, anytime I want to ♥
I got an S in physics and B in history, again. Well, I'm really surprised about physics, because I did lots of mistakes, and my test was like crap. My teacher told me that I have been good at our articles (I got a O in all 'em). Must be because of it. And lemme explain our grades:
O - best grade 80% - 100%
B - second best grade 65% - 70%
S - not that bad 40% - 60%
I - the worst 0% - 30%
Something like this. I got just two or three I's. Which is really good, as this school is really different than the one I used to study.
I got an Bible today lol Forreal, there was a guy giving it for us in school. Not bad.

I hope that my grandpa gets better ♥

cya ♥

bouncy pic #1

not my picture at all (i'm not that pretty lol), but i just love this picture! her hair and outfit ♥
i have boots just like hers, but mine is red brown-wine ish

boncy #1

Bloggin something isn't with me, but okie. Express your ideas is a lovely way of healing something, whatever. But heals.
Now Google has my cellphone ♥ They could send me "guten morgen" each morning, it would be cool.
I guess that I need a good template now... Well, as I'm with Photoshop CS5, my life is complete now ♥
Ok, not thaaaaat complete, but... WOOT CS5!
Erm, but I need to learn some stuff first, as I just used CS4 and CS2 all life a.k.a 14 years. In something about two months I'm 15! Gosh, I'm getting older.. I still remember good funky moments of my childhood. Counting the days, seems to be more than JUST 14 years..

Ok, have biology stuff to print and take a shower... It's cold, but I NEED!
cya ♥